Friday, January 16, 2009

God made the world in 7 days...

... I can shatter mine in 7 seconds...

~~~~~~

So my first week of training at T-Mobile is done and it went well. I have a great class of people but the information has been a bit dry to say the least. Learning the systems is interesting but it is like all the information is being thrown at me and I need to make sure I figure out how to get things all together once I get calls. I think the rest of us in the class, well, maybe a couple feel the way I do -- at least I hope they do!! I go back tomorrow to start my week again and I am excited to learn more but I hope I get things and start putting things together. I keep getting told that it will come together so I am believing them!
Today I am just having a little "me" time because Rick is at work even though he is in horrible pain from having two, yes two hernias. I feel so bad for him. I have seen him in pain before of course but this is so hard. I'm genuinely worried for him and his well being, my heart is worried. He is so strong though, more than I think he gives himself credit for. Yesterday I made sure he lifted barely anything... I returned bottles.. lifted our heavy ass laundry bags.. I just did everything because I know that one false move and the hernias could get worse. Right now.. I dont need him getting worse and I hope that once he sees the surgeon Wednesday (who is amazing) that Rick will be scheduled for surgery within the week because he can't keep doing this. He keeps a strong front though, he does, and that is something I adore and admire about him but he is in pain, and I need him to rest.
I just did my "duties" taking care of our zillion pets. Both bunny cages are clean and they jumped and binkied around (which means they are excited and happy), I made them some treats, I cleaned the gerbil cage, gave treats to the kitties... and fed the fish. Yesterday was super sad.. my beta that Rick gave me almost 3 years ago, BeBe (he might have liked the boy betas ) died. I'm so bummed. I asked Rick for another Beta for Christmas.. I hope I get one, it would be the best gift ever.
Last night Rick and I went to his Nana's to visit and have dinner. We hung out with Matt and Annie.. and his Aunt Diane and Uncle Gary. We had dinner and then... we thought we should put up the Christmas tree for Nana. This is the first Christmas since Grampa's passing and I think it was great that we put it up for her to show her that we care, that we all miss him too, and that he probably would have wanted a tree up as well. Grampa's passing was the first in Rick's family to pass away and I know it is going to be hard for them. I keep Rick's entire family in my prayers.
Every year Rick and I buy a Christmas ornament to show for another year of us being together and last night I went to Rite Aid to grab some soda on my way home because a train was crossing so I figured I would stop.. but while I was in there I walked through the Christmas aisle for the hell of it and I bought two ornaments, a dove, and a bird house with a cardinal on it.. because.. on Rick's Nana and Grampa's tree they always put a white dove on it... and they also have a birdhouse one like it. These ornaments are for Rick and this year... and to remember Grampa. I took a couple of pictures of the ornaments that we have bought through the years, they are great and remind me of all the holidays Rick and I have spent by each other's side.
So that's it for now, it's all I got.
~Jill~

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"When you're little, nighttime is scary because there are monsters hiding underneath the bed. When you get older, the monsters are different; self doubt, lonliness, regret, and though you may be older and wiser, you still find yourself scared of the dark"

original post 12/06/08

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